Post a Poem... (yeah really)

[WickedPerdition]

The only thing I’m good at by Dell P MacTaighain



I suck at most things

Dire at relationships

Useless at the nine to five

Can’t handle the traffic of others

I wouldn’t even have me as

a member of my own family

Terrible at world peace

A total sham at small talk

But one thing I’m expert in

I excel in it…

Being human

You consider this jumble of nonsense to be poetry?
No wonder everybody thinks they can sing these days!
Dell P MacTaighan has a lot to answer for, judging from the examples above.
I always thought it was H. P. MacTaighain, by the way.
That's MY poem for today!

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

You consider this jumble of nonsense to be poetry?
No wonder everybody thinks they can sing these days!
Dell P MacTaighan has a lot to answer for, judging from the examples above.
I always thought it was H. P. MacTaighain, by the way.
That's MY poem for today!

wonderful poem, a great example of what is called an 'End Rhyme'

 

[angelo]

LOVE a bit of poetry- reading it, hearing it, attempting it, so thank you for this thread Monkey Person
My contribution is a little old, but one my favourites from my more creative and adventurous days

Hey girls- Watch out!
Mr BDSM is about!
With his professional photos and his cheeky banter
You’d never guess that he likes a spanker.

Hey girls- Watch out!
Mr BDSM is about!
And he’ll reel you in with his leather strap
Telling you that he’s not really experienced at this crap
Blaming an ex for his new obsession
Then asking you meekly to teach him a lesson

Hey girls- Watch out!
Mr BDSM is about!
Spicing up your morning with a naughty text
Making your mind pre-occupied with sex
Asking for permission to go through his day
He’s a submissive in every single way

Hey girls-Watch out!
Mr BDSM is about!
Telling you he likes it when you call him a freak
And giving him abuse every time you speak
He likes it majorly kinky with dirty thrown in
But you’d never know to simply look at him

Hey girls-Watch out!
Mr BDSM is about!
So confident with his bullshit and blagger
You’d never guess that he was a serial shagger
Picking up chicks from a dating website
Genuinely being tied up every night

Hey girls- Watch out!
Mr BDSM is about!
For experience- he’s the tops! You’ll learn things you never knew
But forgive his narcissism- it’s not personal against you
He’s Mr BDSM and he’s a hot, blooded male
Nothing could match his obsession or previous female
So now you’ve been warned- stay alert and stay sane
Because Mr BDSM is a Master at his game.

well it's obviously a copy and paste job as your not the best of spellers in the chat rooms lmao

 

[angelo]

Thank you. x
I can still remember his name, he only spoke to me once, I remember every word, but the final humiliation was, he asked my friend out...she was 13, and a lot more mature than I was, I was heartbroken.

I saw him a few years later and didn't even recognise him, so obviously it wasn't meant to be.

phew

 

[angelo]

my love is like a red red rose till my boyfriend gave me a dose

 

[CrazyCatLady]

well it's obviously a copy and paste job as your not the best of spellers in the chat rooms lmao

And you're not the most observant. I don't go in the chat rooms! lmao

And funny copy paste job, seeing as that's not anywhere on the internet.

lmao

 

[CrazyCatLady]

About 5-6 years old, but still relevant....

Now, now, calm down,
Let’s review the situation
You’re getting your pants wet over forced immigration
So let’s not be selfish and get all territorial
You’re going to do as you’re told, because this is political
So sit down and don’t go getting all racist
Of course, they’re kids! They’re not twenty-six
And none of them worship a child rapist.

Don’t be silly now- there’s no need for this
None of these male hoards are misogynists
They believe in peace and love ordered by their voice from above
And they’re a perfect cultural fit!
You’re being a bigot now and it’s not socially apt
Being Multi-cultural is where it’s at
Being British is sooo yesterday
Old, like democracy and a quiet Sunday

And why do you go on about the NHS?
Old people love sitting in corridors as they rest
It’s trendy to wait weeks for a doctor’s appointment
Because after all, our brothers need their ointments
Is the Daily Mail getting to you?
And Brietbart is ringing in your ears?
Life in 21st Century Britain looks dark now
And the media is stoking up your fears
So have a cup of herbal tea, dear
And turn off the electrics
Go down town, where they hang around and feel the harmonics
Just block out the heckling, it’s how they communicate
They’ve got to get used to being around women they can’t dominate
So in the meantime, cover up and divert your eyes
It’s YOUR job to help them integrate, so just ignore their holy cries

Why so paranoid, darling?
There’s no need for the defence!
Not everything is at the taxpayers expense
They come with valuable gifts for us all
There’s not nearly enough mosques or benefit fraud
So don’t be xenophobic now- it’s really not in style
A life of breeding and hijabs has been feminism for a while
So stop your nationalist whinging and cop a clue
You’re white AND British, so everything’s so out of touch with you
Unless you’re living like Lilly and able to pay with your words
Your insignificant views are worthless, lovey
So shut up and join the herds

You’re starting to sound like a Nazi now,
A real friend of the Reich
If you don’t believe in welcoming our Brother-cousins
Then you must be far to the right
If you all sat down and discussed things, I’m sure you’ll see the light
And develop some compassion, for the Kalergi plan plight
Merkel is an angel, you know- she’s saved over a million lives
And guaranteed your daughter will be a subservient wife

Britain could learn a lesson- take a tip or two
After all, multiculturalism is good for you
You get to be thought of as inferior
Because of a set of ideals and aims
But then your intelligence needs to be questioned
If you object to their prophets claims
And anyway, you take it all too seriously
Moderates exist, you know- not every one is a terrorist
And if you don’t like their homophobic teachings, you must be a racist!

Don’t you know it’s all the rage now
To accept what you’ve been told
They’re oppressed, repressed and depressed
And colonisation has left them cold
That’s why they’re the victims-
Why can’t you see you’re in the wrong?
Why do you keep going on about Britain
And looking after they’re own
It’s educating to have crowded classrooms
And discrimination between religious sects
And why should they have to work with the opposite sex?
If that’s what they believe, then you can’t judge
And if you’re white, you can’t throw any mud
We’re ALL immigrants, you idiot, with your Celtic blood
You spit British, but you’re only here because of a flood
Grand ancestors hit a boat and bred
Wallowed in the factories, kept a low head
‘No Blacks, No Irish and No Dogs’ is what they got
And now you’re throwing in with your lot
But why the hell am I bothering? You still shout the same
That your ancestors played the integration game

That’s not the way now- YOU have to bend to THEM
You have to learn the culture, about its beautiful gems
Like arranged marriage- forced or not
And genital mutilation, soon after the cot
Keep it in the family, it’s a good philosophy
It’s not brainwashing, if done in religiosity
And what’s not to love about multiple wives?
It’s cultural enrichment and should be a part of all our lives
Why you should disagree, I have no idea
Speed breeding should be a right, you know
And the law should make that clear
And while I can’t debate the British Caphilates
They make the best drugs over here

I’m going to end this now-
I’ve told you I don’t care
That no one speaks English where you are
Or that women get spat on for showing hair
I don’t see it and that’s all that matters
What you’re saying is just racist chatter
You whinging Brexiters are all the same
Can’t find your guilt and share your privileged terrain
But your English rose-tinted spectacles will lose their nose
When the newest housing estate fills with rubbish rows
From the new boat load and the mess they throw
And your rent rises aren’t my concern and neither is a lack of jobs
There’s a culture to learn and I can’t hear your sobs
So up-date your mind-set, we WILL take control
With labels and corruption, you’ll end up thinking how you’re told.

 

[CrazyCatLady]

This should have a thread all of its own.

Why, thank you!
However, that kind of exposure might attract the sea gulls.

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

Karmalite weaponry By Dell P MacTaighain

Today I made a gun

Then shot those that helped me make it

By not firing a single bullet

When the corpses were advertised

My alibi was honesty

My reasoning pure

My weapon of choice

is my wallet

And I haven’t wasted a round

On an innocent target yet

Buybuy consumerism

Enjoy the cake you had and ate

And no longer have

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

I wrote this to highlight the futility of war as a means of getting people to like or join you. Only the insane punch people and say 'let's be closer', why do countries still do it? War is sooooo last century, play a different serenade to make friends. #Ukraine #UkraineRussiaWar

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

A Tea Chewed



I work 11 hours a day

Don’t ask…

you wouldn’t do it for twice the money

My wife works 3 hours and 15 minutes a day

Don’t ask…

I did the numbers from the complaints she had

I’ve missed my kids my whole life (work)

Missed their first steps (work)

Missed their first words (work)

Missed their first bruise (work)

Missed their first laugh (work)

I could go on

For all those years and years (work)

Listening to my family scream for independence from me

Parading their aggravation on me

As I closed a tired door (work)

I never once screamed independence

From them

(work)

Ignored the servitude of their obvious excellence

And just asked for a cup of tea​

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

The only rule of Time Travel by Dell MacTaighain

Axiom 1: Neither the Future nor the Past can be changed, only the Present

The future exists only within imagination.
The past only exists within memory.
There is no transport nor geographical map
that could ever take that journey
other than Self within the Present to change it.

Planets do not realign
because you smothered Hitler with a pillow as a baby
in your
or someone else’s imagination.

Trying to invent machines and technology that can go
into the past or future
will only change the present, there
and will only change the future, there.

The past and the future you have changed there was
– and always will be -
your present.

 

[Moriarty]

Thoughts are related to me and thee
Different actions may be related
Thoughts and actions can be out of sync
Though minds can be in synergy

Our buts are relative too, you see
I but you then you but me
My but is this, yours is that
But all buts fade in history

E. T. Medalis

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

The Nun
(C) me, years ago

I one time met a nun.
It was said she had bad habits.
I offered to give her new ones
but the convent wouldn't have it.

he heh - b-boom

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

My Itchy parts by Heuristic Monkey



Sometimes I see leaves

Wishing they were trees

Sometimes I see scornful looks

like pages ripped from torn up books

Trampled underfoot

Sometimes I had thoughts of a well prepared world

But I was just a child of amazed interest

Often I cornered the extraordinary

Hoping they were normal and would continue

Each day

Resolved to the commonplace with scorn

As the trees turned into glorious colour

The beckoning hues of autumn

Like civilisations rising and falling like seasons past

So sometimes goes and comes with occasional youth

and the weariness of age

With alltimes

And with alltimes

comes that which are but memories

of times softly lived

gladly danced through

Now clung to like a lifebelt

In a torrid, torrid tide

I'm not crying I'm Laughing

From everything stuck unsaid inside

 

[HeuristicMonkey]

This poem comes free by Dell MacTaighain



This poem is free

It has no long term debt enclosed

It has a smile

And a hug

And no strings attached

It has no red letters

No anger

No furrowed brows

It contains nothing more

Than an understanding

Of whom you are

And the geography of the music within you

The space you hold

The breaths you take amidst The Dire

Remember this free poem

At your worst…

And breathe

I was there too​

 

[Ingrid1965]

Blue&Red

I Love you in Blue,
I like you in Red...
But most of all I like you on Top in Bed

 

[Claire8]

I hate Christmas!

So, it may not be popular, many may think that it's not right,
But I hate Christmas, yes, I hate with all my might,
And no, it isn't because I'm tight,
People get so excited knowing that its near,
Whilst I truly hate this time of year,
Quietly hoping that i can run from it and to disappear,
Fed up with people expecting all this false Christmas cheer,
Acting like idiots out on the beer,
Because Christmas is overrated and seems to go on forever,
November hits and it seems to start, until the month of never,
Tv full of Christmas ads, of shops competing to sell,
Bright eyed kids saying i was that this and that as well,
Parents struggling to financially, which for many is hell,
Rushing and stressing to get out and buy,
Materialistic Christmas i hate and its clear why,
Everything is expensive, it's all got a price,
Then people say it's about family and festivities it's meant to be nice,
Many using it as an excuse, to overeat or drink,
When they can eat and drink whatever they like all year round, come on think,
Sadly, many many people spend it all alone,
Many homeless on the street, longing for just a home,
Having to see family, you might not what to see,
Arguing and bickering the joys of family.
With many of missing loved ones who've passed away,
I hate it all, yes, it's true more than a financial price to pay,
Goes on forever when it's meant to be just one day,
It's meant to be religious to but that side no one seems to see,
All it seems to be about is what's under the tree,
Joyous people forgetting how for many it causes loneliness, stress and misery,
Then people moan come on its Christmas like you should be full of glee,
Christmas songs playing everywhere repeatedly,
So, I hate Christmas and it won't change even if you don't agree!