Jokes here please

MatUre

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Q. Bill has 50 snickers bars
He eats 23, gives 2 to his sister and 1 to his Mum and 1 to his girlfriend.
He later eats 23 bars.
What does Andy have now.
Scroll down for the answer






















A. Diabetes
 

megs233

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Q. Bill has 50 snickers bars
He eats 23, gives 2 to his sister and 1 to his Mum and 1 to his girlfriend.
He later eats 23 bars.
What does Andy have now.
Scroll down for the answer






















A. Diabetes
was not andy eating them was Bill
 

MatUre

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Two cannibals are eating a clown
One asked the other " Does this food taste funny to you"
 

MatUre

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One snowman to another
"Can you smell carrots?"
 

megs233

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Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.
 

MatUre

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When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I think it's so sweet. Then I think why would people bring a knife on a date?
 

megs233

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When I was younger I felt like a man trapped inside a woman’s body. Then I was born.
 

MatUre

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It is wonderful to wake up in the morning with someone cuddling you. Unless you happen to be in prison.:(
 

megs233

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I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister
 

MatUre

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Farting in lifts is wrong on so many levels.
 

LondonGuy

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I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down!
 

LondonGuy

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A woman walks into a library and asked if they had any books about paranoia. The librarian says "They're right behind you!"
 

LondonGuy

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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up? Because it was two tired!
 

MatUre

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What to do if your man starts smoking.
Slow down and consider using a lubricant.
 

MatUre

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What is the difference between the G Spot and a golf Ball?
Men will spend 5 minutes looking for a golf ball.
 
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