BREAST IS BEST?

[Saphire]

Well yes, it probably is, but mothers shouldn't be judged if they don't want to, or can't, breast feed their babies. Her body...her choice surely.
One woman wrote this week that she was afraid to post any pics of her and her baby online if there were any clues that she was bottle feeding.
Apparently it's not unusual for new mothers to be shamed into breast feeding...is this a new thing, I don't remember this happening when I had my child.

 

[Moriarty]

Women should be allowed to feed thier babies as they see fit.

To be "that guy", I'm more an ass and legs man anyway.

 

[funandflirty]

Well yes, it probably is, but mothers shouldn't be judged if they don't want to, or can't, breast feed their babies. Her body...her choice surely.
One woman wrote this week that she was afraid to post any pics of her and her baby online if there were any clues that she was bottle feeding.
Apparently it's not unusual for new mothers to be shamed into breast feeding...is this a new thing, I don't remember this happening when I had my child.

Fed is best!

Unfortunately you get moaned at if you bottle feed, and moaned at if you breast feed - It’s always best to trust yourself and ignore everyone’s well meaning criticism.

Mum shaming isn’t new, and the feeding/weening/crying it out vs attachment parenting - is all ways mums are made to feel guilty…. Humans are horribly flawed x

 

[Saphire]

Fed is best!

Unfortunately you get moaned at if you bottle feed, and moaned at if you breast feed - It’s always best to trust yourself and ignore everyone’s well meaning criticism.

Mum shaming isn’t new, and the feeding/weening/crying it out vs attachment parenting - is all ways mums are made to feel guilty…. Humans are horribly flawed x

'Fed is best'....brilliant.

You are right about others trying to make mums feel guilty, I remember the disdain of a couple of nurses when I said I would be giving my baby a dummy.
It did no harm, and it comforted him. Turned out both nurses didn't have kids of their own.

It's easy to be a perfect parent in theory.

 

[Dolores]

I think it is because of all these trends to go back to "natural". And people are judgmental, no matter of your choice. As long as it is different than theirs...I couldn't breastfeed my son for many reasons, and unfortunately I had to explain why constantly . To the extend when someone purposed to use a milk bank...

P.S - He is doing just fine, no harm from the bottle feeding

 

[LadyOnArooftop]

The ones who insist on beast feeding in public are fanatics. Using the argument that it's the most natural thing in the world - so deal with it. Going to the lavatory is also very natural. So like breast feeding, i'd rather you did it in private darling.
So it has to be bottle feeding, if only for the convenience. With an electric steriliser they can be done in minutes.

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Mother politely asked to breastfeed in a skip​

A mother breastfeeding in a shop was politely asked to go and do it in a nearby walk in skip instead.

23-year-old Emma Bradford was feeding her five-week-old daughter in the empty changing room of a high street fashion retailer when staff entered with electrified cattle prods.

Bradford said: “They said I was upsetting other customers, which is why none of them would come in the shop, and ushered me down to a windowless cellar.

“Then they said there’d been a complaint from a rat and made me go around the back and crouch between two bins in the rain.

“But I was still visible from the street and so they shooed me into a skip full of out-of-date seafood, where I finished her feed and gave her a little burp.

“I don’t think I want to shop there again.”

Manager Joanna Kramer said: “I don’t see the problem with making people do anything as long as you ask them politely.”

via ~ Daily48DD

 

[Dolores]

Gosh...I read that as 5-years-old daughter !

 

[funandflirty]

The ones who insist on beast feeding in public are fanatics. Using the argument that it's the most natural thing in the world - so deal with it. Going to the lavatory is also very natural. So like breast feeding, i'd rather you did it in private darling.
So it has to be bottle feeding, if only for the convenience. With an electric steriliser they can be done in minutes.

Lovely lady! Please you did not just compare feeding to using the lavatory .

I found nothing more convenient that whipping out natures bottle and feeding as and when my daughter was hungry, and if she was really lucky they may be some chocolate crumbs .

I appreciate some don’t want to see it but they can walk away or look the other way, if you leave a child hungry I think the child screaming will upset more people x

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Five ways to breastfeed in public if you really must​

Unless you’re a model, pop star or on Love Island, breastfeeding in public is often frowned upon.

Follow these rules to protect the population from a hideous glimpse of breast.

Train your baby to ask for milk at appropriate times
Teach your new baby only to ask for milk in the privacy of your own home, preferably when all the curtains are closed. Everyone knows babies are easy to get into a routine so this shouldn’t be a problem.

Hide away
If you have neglected to train your baby not to feed in public, shame on you. Now you have no option but to feed them where there are no people at all. Ditches, public toilets and disused factories are all great places to bond with your baby.

Cover right up
To avoid inadvertently seducing other people’s partners with an accidental nipple flash, it’s best to completely cover yourself in a sheet when out and about. It’s practical, it’s modest and you’ll have a readymade Halloween costume.

Do not leave the house
Your best option when you have a baby is just to stay at home. Not forever, just until your child learns to eat food that doesn’t come out of your sex breasts.

Use your breasts appropriately
If you are unable to do any of the above then the least you can do is use your breasts for their true purpose – to arouse and excite strangers – while you are feeding the baby. Give a cheeky wink to anyone who looks in your direction, or better still get a tattoo saying ‘Phwoar!’ on your breasts.

via ~ DailyMammaryGland

 

[Dolores]

Lovely lady! Please you did not just compare feeding to using the lavatory .

I found nothing more convenient that whipping out natures bottle and feeding as and when my daughter was hungry, and if she was really lucky they may be some chocolate crumbs .

I appreciate some don’t want to see it but they can walk away or look the other way, if you leave a child hungry I think the child screaming will upset more people x

Well, that is the point isn't it? I appreciate it, but.... not really. You have to cope with my breasts out while you are having your lunch, or break, or whatever. If you don't like it, walk away. Simple as.

Should I consider to do this somewhere private ? Why to bother, it's the most natural thing on Earth...I dare you to say something else.

And by breasts out, I mean breastfeeding, before anyone asks

 

[Saphire]

There is always a right and a wrong way to do something.
I can't stand people who tut when a mum is feeding her baby in public, it IS natural, after all, it's what breasts were designed for.
The fact they bring so much pleasure to so many men is just a bonus.

On the other hand, I can't stand tree hugging mothers who think it is their right to inconvenience others by feeding their babies in inappropriate places. There was one not that long ago that kicked up a huge fuss because she was asked politely to step out of the toddler swimming pool and find somewhere more comfortable to breastfeed.

I do wonder also, why a minority of women show a complete breast to feed in public, it's just not necessary, and I think it must be done for attention.

 

[LadyOnArooftop]

Yes @funandflirty I did equate baby feeding to going to the lavatory. But i'm not quite sure why I made that comparison. Both are natural things to do, yet some insist one can be done anywhere but the other must be done in private.
Thinking about it... Let me put forward to the forum the following case...
You're sitting next to a man on a bus, he's desperate for a leak and can't hang on so he just wops it out and does it in an empty can/bottle. Are you happy with that or would you rather he went somewhere else and did it?
In some cases breast feeding in public may be more about making a statement...
btw @Saphire Great thread!

 

[Saphire]

Baby milk is pure, it's not bodily waste, breast feeding on a bus is not the same as peeing in a bottle in public.
Even more disgusting than that though....was years ago, on a bus in Spain, some oaf took off his shoes and started getting the dirt out from between his toes...then flicking it on the floor.

Many acts that are natural are also best kept private.

 

[funandflirty]

Yes @funandflirty I did equate baby feeding to going to the lavatory. But i'm not quite sure why I made that comparison. Both are natural things to do, yet some insist one can be done anywhere but the other must be done in private.
Thinking about it... Let me put forward to the forum the following case...
You're sitting next to a man on a bus, he's desperate for a leak and can't hang on so he just wops it out and does it in an empty can/bottle. Are you happy with that or would you rather he went somewhere else and did it?
In some cases breast feeding in public may be more about making a statement...
btw @Saphire Great thread!

It is a great thread kudos to @Saphire xx

i think it’s mind set, breastfeeding is more a kin to a diabetic desperately needing to eat to stabilise their blood sugar, than a man flopping out his dong (made me laugh typing that).

Also as an ample bosomed lady I had no choice than to lift out of my top than under it so although there was exposure quite honestly it wasn’t as much as some low cut tops.

I was never militant about it (although I was a LLL leader) but I did arrange a feed in when a friend in our nct group was shamed in a coffee shop for breastfeeding! It was pretty fun tbh.

@Saphire the feeding in the pool is not ok if I recall there was a discrimination case brought against a public pool/gym and it was deemed the decision to ask mum to stop was lawful due to no food being allowed at the poolside.

 

[BronzeSquirrel]

I'm not particularly bothered by women feeding babies in public.

 

[CrazyCatLady]

Motherhood is hard enough as it is, without constantly being judged for how you choose to feed your child. We have generations of adults that were bottle fed and they haven't turned into raging green monsters! It's silly how the 'Mumsnet' generation shame each other, while pretending to support one another. A mother should do what she feels is comfortable and best for her and her child. If mum is suffering because of sore nipples, extreme tiredness & other physical effects of breast feeding on demand, then she's not going to be in the best shape to care and bond, so why not go on to the bottle? The small deficit in health benefits are not half as bad as having a mother with post-natal depression, triggered by her not feeling as if she can provide properly or nourish her child.
Many women express & bottle feed, which can be the best of both worlds, but even then some women are not physically capable of producing enough milk to keep Junior happy.

I attempted to breast feed for the first few days, but did not get on with it at all! Hated the sensation of a small creature sucking on me (seriously- no jokes on this one- reminder of the topic: breast feeding! < for the Opportunists!) and I couldn't tell whether he was taking enough. He definitely grew up healthy. He moved over to a cup on his own at around a year (with the exception of the night bottle up till he was around 2). He just kept pointing to adult's cups, tried him on his fluids in one and he preferred that to the bottle.
And he had a dummy, which was not a nightmare for him to give up. Got rid when he started nursery and it took 2 days for him to stop asking for it.
Tbf, my son was easy with a lot of things. He was very adaptable and easy going- potty training, night routines, behaviour, etc. I used to hear other's stories and think 'Bloody hell! Thank god, I don't have that to deal with!'. Lol

 

[BronzeSquirrel]

What I do find disturbing is kids starting school still in nappies.

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Society obsessed with breasts except in most natural context​

shouldn't a starving baby
be more offensive than a
mother feeding it naturally

Britain is desperate to see breasts except when they are being used to feed a baby, it has been claimed.

The Institute for Studies found that breast-feeding is now the only context in which bare breasts were frowned upon.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Through online and print news outlets the average Briton spends 56 per cent of the day looking at images of breasts. “In most cases they actively pursue the viewing of breasts, for example by clicking on an image of a Rita Ora ‘nip slip’ at a charity awards dinner.

“But strangely 43 per cent of men feel uncomfortable around breasts if they are being used as a milk delivery system.”

Cafe owner Mary Fisher said: “We get a lot of nursing mothers here, and the problem is the use of tit. Anyone who’s ever watched a Carry On film knows that tits are rude and also funny and you don’t really want them around when you’re eating some carrot cake.

“We always suggest diverting the flow of milk to another body part, for example the fingertips or toes.

“Alternately women could develop milk glands in their necks which the baby could suck like a little vampire.”

via ~ DailyNippleator

Breast Feeding in Public (Social Experiment)​

 

[CrazyCatLady]

It is a great thread kudos to @Saphire xx

i think it’s mind set, breastfeeding is more a kin to a diabetic desperately needing to eat to stabilise their blood sugar, than a man flopping out his dong (made me laugh typing that).

Also as an ample bosomed lady I had no choice than to lift out of my top than under it so although there was exposure quite honestly it wasn’t as much as some low cut tops.

I was never militant about it (although I was a LLL leader) but I did arrange a feed in when a friend in our nct group was shamed in a coffee shop for breastfeeding! It was pretty fun tbh.

@Saphire the feeding in the pool is not ok if I recall there was a discrimination case brought against a public pool/gym and it was deemed the decision to ask mum to stop was lawful due to no food being allowed at the poolside.

I can't understand the shaming of breast feeding in public and can't abide the staring. I remember being with a friend who had to breast feed in a cafe in the Mall of my old town. Firstly, the staff asked her to move to outside the cafe to the seats in the Mall (we didn't challenge it at the time. Some places allowed it, some didn't) and then she was stared at when someone clocked she was feeding. It was as if it was an abnormal behaviour to need to feed your child in public.

It doesn't bother me in the slightest. It's an exchange of nurture behaviour, as well as a feeding action, so it shouldn't be seen as unusual or offensive in public spaces.
What I find more offensive is the amount of crack on show with the very small skirts that young women wear now-a-days! I mean- an accidently t!t on show because you have to feed your child is much more appetising to witness than the slapping of cheeks of a young girl that didn't know inches from centimetres when ordering her outfit from Boohoo!