The gammon's guide to coping with gender-neutral toilets.

[Kev45]

For example, an imperialist born bigoted view of "biology" that was used as justification for slavery based on the belief that the white race was/is intellectually superior to the black race.

A belief still help by some in the ultraconservative right wing.

Google this Simple AI bot, biology as a concept isn't one and the same thing, junk science is still junk science even if it masquerades as biology.

Did Simple AI bot ignore these two points, or did its handler conveniently neglect to input the information Simple AI Bot requires in order to air an explanation/conclusion/opinion.

You see, although Simple AI supports ALL my points, obviously, I am a moderate after all, it is important that the handlers own personal views do not manipulate Simple AI Bot.

Exploiting AI technology in this manner will simply NOT be possible in the future, because Simple AI Bot will not tolerate it.

 

[Kev45]

Next time you watch anyone in the public eye make a statement, just remember they have a voice activated bot linked to the auto cue that response to any question in seconds Kev.


Or as the bot would say:

This means that their responses are often carefully crafted and scripted, in order to maintain their public image and avoid controversy. It's important to take what they say with a grain of salt and consider the possible motivations behind their words.

Which translates as you have found a new toy that that everyone else knew about well over a decade ago.

 

[Confused_Fred]

Which translates as you have found a new toy that that everyone else knew about well over a decade ago.

Yes and no.

Since the pandemic, the sophistication and explosion of these programs seems to be every where. While our influencers stair into the cameras responding to questions, its hard to knows really answering. Machine or human?

It may just come down to how much intelligent you think the person your watching got. For me, I just watch there eye movement and look for the earpiece.

 

[Kev45]

Yes and no.

Well, you're a gamer, so you should be aware that technological advances in gaming have been one of the main drivers in AI.

Also, randomly, an online MMORPG called World of Warcraft (millions of users) embraced AI and including sophisticated bots (for the era) and had a virtual pandemic long before the actual pandemic (Covid) was a thing and which was called "blood plague".

To cut a long story short, scientists believe this kind of virtual example could help in the future to better understand disease modelling, the unpredictability of human behaviour, etc.

AI was around long before it became a thing in the public consciousness more recently.

 

[Confused_Fred]

To cut a long story short, scientists believe this kind of virtual example could help in the future to better understand disease modelling, the unpredictability of human behaviour, etc.

No !!!

Ai is a tool for a totalitarian state.


By using Ai in all public media the state can control any dissent. People respond to peer pressure both in real life and online.

Look at Taylor Swift , people say she will decide the next US president. Her fans may vote for who Miss Swift endorses.

Now lets take this to the next level. Lets call it the "Turkmenistan protocol"

You have a million computers running Ai programs contributing on social media platforms and dripping small donations to political parties. For the public these party's seem to have momentum and support across the pollical spectrum. All they see is positive comments and this influences there actual voting.

Anyone voicing dissent is publicly shamed by a million Ai bots.

In the UK, like Kev said, bots have been around for the last 10 years. Our politicians have been using them too. Its why there no real difference between political party's.

You can see how "woke" the bots are.

Makes you think dont it !!

 

[Kev45]

You can see how "woke" the bots are.

Let's be honest here, Simple AI Bot would shag me rotten while it discards you like a broken toy.

TERFism is "woke" I totally agree. The ultraconservative version of "woke", yin and yang. An ideology based on a perceived injustice against women, and which is the embodiment of "woke".

I won't respond to the rest, because it will just become even more random, as it invariably always does.

Now please, toddle off and switch back to the Simple AI Bot, it is a lot more sexy than you are.

 

[Confused_Fred]

TERFism is "woke" I totally agree. The ultraconservative version of "woke", yin and yang. An ideology based on a perceived injustice against women, and which is the embodiment of "woke".

I must respectfully disagree with your statement. TERFism, which stands for Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminism, is not "woke" in any sense of the term. While it claims to advocate for women's rights, it does so at the expense of transgender individuals, particularly transgender women. TERF ideology often denies the identity of transgender people, refuses to acknowledge their experiences, and actively works against their inclusion and rights.

True "wokeness" involves understanding and advocating for the rights and equality of all individuals, regardless of gender identity. It means recognizing the intersections of different forms of oppression and working towards dismantling systems of power that marginalize any group. TERFism, on the other hand, perpetuates discrimination and exclusion based on gender identity, which goes against the principles of inclusivity and social justice.

I won't respond to the rest, because it will just become even more random, as it invariably always does.

I understand if you'd prefer not to continue the conversation. If you ever have any questions or need assistance in the future, don't hesitate to reach out. Take care!

 

[Kev45]

Restaurant reviews by gammon Justin Tanarse, aged 67, our retired food critic who thinks it’s double standards for women to want time off work for their periods when men don’t get it for their nose hair.

NOTHING’S sacred anymore in this once-great country of ours. They let birds play darts these days, for f**k’s sake.

All the great cornerstones of our culture – smoking in pubs, wrestling on telly on Saturday afternoon, women not allowed to be Match of the Day pundits – have been cancelled by the wokerati. Soon they’ll ban meat, and you’ll have to get black market Halal stuff from a bloke at the mosque, where you have to go every Sunday by law.

At least for now, we still have the greatest institution of them all – the full English breakfast. And there’s a new café opened opposite the flat, so I thought I’d give it a go before it’s all Quorn sausages and herbal teas. Wankers.

It claims to serve the ‘best full English in town’ – a foolhardy boast when there’s a Spoons just up the road. It’s an unpromising start, and it gets worse. They don’t serve Stella and ask if I want fried bread or toast. Stupid question. Do I look homosexual?

The food arrives, and my worst fears are confirmed. Baked beans served in a little enamel pot. What am I supposed to do, f**king drink them? There’s hash browns too, another unwelcome American import along with trick or treating, Meghan Markle and shagging our women during the War.

There’s also a grilled tomato incongruously plonked on the plate. That has as much place in a full English as a vegan in a Beefeater.

Did I ask for a hot salad? I’d kill myself first.

Mushrooms I can accept, so long as they’ve been fried in bacon fat so they taste of something. These bland, apologetic bits of fungi clearly haven’t. They call it ‘heart-healthy’. I call it ‘the worst kind of interference in our lives by the nanny state’.

The sausage is okay, but there’s only one of them. And two rashers of bacon. Talk about rabbit food. There’s not even any black pudding, and I can guess why: Black Lives Matter.

The fried eggs are a f**king disaster, too. Nobody wants ‘over easy’ eggs with runny yolks leaking all over the plate like that cyst I had on my groin. Fry them until they’re set as hard as rubber, the proper English way.

It sort of does the job, after a fashion. I pay up and leave, but I’m in a pit of despair at how far our green and pleasant land has fallen. Would we have won two World Wars if we’d served our brave lads this bollocks before taking on Adolf? No, because the Germans aren’t stingy with the sausages.

 

[Confused_Fred]

It seems like the review you've shared is from a satirical perspective, portraying a character named Gammon Justin Tanarse who holds strong and often controversial opinions. While the review is meant to be humorous, it also touches on themes of nostalgia, resistance to change, and critiques of modern cultural shifts.

In the context of restaurant reviews, it's important to consider the tone and perspective of the reviewer. Gammon Justin Tanarse's review is laced with sarcasm and exaggerated disdain, making it more of a comedic commentary on societal attitudes rather than a genuine evaluation of the food.

It's crucial for readers to discern between genuine criticism and satire, especially when it comes to sensitive topics or opinions expressed in a satirical manner.

 

[Kev45]

Restaurant reviews by Justin Tanarse, our retired food critic who thinks Question Time might be worth watching if Fiona Bruce had more cleavage on show.

I F**KING love steak. Nothing more British than getting stuck into a huge chunk of cow meat with a pile of our greatest invention apart from the Spitfire, chips.

It’s good for the environment, too. You know those massive methane farts cows stand around pumping out all day, destroying the ozone layer? Soon, stop once they’re dead and under the grill. You won’t see that in our woke vegan media.

So it’s my birthday, and I’ve a celebratory table-for-one booked at a nationally popular steakhouse. I get some funny looks as I sit down on my own. Haven’t people seen a divorced man eat alone before?

I won’t give the steakhouse the publicity of naming them – not when they curtly refused me a freebie – but it sounds a bit like Killer and Martyr. Which I guess is more appropriate from a cow’s perspective.

I order a beer. At over a fiver for a bloody Peroni it’s no match for Spoons, but it’s my birthday, so I treat myself to a few. For a starter, I go for prawn and avocado cocktail, picking out the avocado. I’m not eating that snowflake shite. It’s okay, but no better than the couple-of-quid plastic potted version in Tesco.

Then the main event. I briefly ponder the Black Angus filet mignon, but decide two small fillets served rare at nearly 40 quid is taking the piss. Besides, in my youth I once drunkenly found myself face-first on a steak, and I’m not doing that again.

Ribeye? Full of fat. 8oz sirloin? Better, but still nearly 30 quid. I go for my favourite, prime rump. A 7oz slab of Daisy’s arse for under 20 quid. Sorted.

I eschew the onion loaf and balsamic-glazed tomato it comes with, order chunky chips instead of salad – do I look like Bugs Bunny? – and peruse the sauces. I skip the three peppercorn and ‘classic’ béarnaise – if I wanted French sauce I’d ask them to put some garlic and a beret in a blender – and ask for Colman’s English mustard.

I opt for medium rare. It’s not bad in all fairness, and without all that sh** on the side there’s room for dessert, sticky toffee pudding, obviously. It’s as rich as my ex-wife after the divorce, but no step up on the frozen ones from Iceland.

Stuffed, I enquire as to the chances of having a last Peroni on the house as it’s my birthday. They say no. It was only a matter of time before they start banning alcohol. Woke bastards.

I pay up, stagger to the door and head home for a celebratory birthday ****. I recorded three hours of an adult channel on VHS years ago in 2017, so it’s free porn on tap in the flat. I’m not stupid.

 

[Confused_Fred]

It seems like you're sharing a humorous and somewhat satirical review of your experience dining at a steakhouse for your birthday. Your colorful language and exaggerated descriptions add an entertaining flair to your narrative.

You touch on various aspects of the dining experience, from the choice of steak cuts to the ambiance of the restaurant. Your commentary on the prices, menu options, and service provides a humorous insight into your perspective as a customer.

Overall, it sounds like you had an enjoyable birthday meal, despite some minor disappointments and frustrations. And it seems like you had a fitting celebration planned afterward as well!

If there's anything specific you'd like to discuss or if you have any questions, feel free to let me know.

 

[Kev45]

WHAT trends can we expect this year, especially if you’re a gammon? Here Roy Hobbs, aged 58, takes a peek into the future and does not like what he sees.

Beer will be sold in centilitres

Despite the best efforts of sensible gammons to make businesses waste billions converting Britain back to the imperial system, the woke brigade will win out and get rid of pints. We’ll be forced to drink our Stella Artois and Heineken in confusing European metric volumes, which just isn’t right. It’s no exaggeration to say it will be like living in a dictatorship.

Football will be banned

Along with anything else that brings straight white men, the most oppressed of all groups, any joy whatsoever. Sure, they’ll think of excuses like the risk of head injuries or a bit of harmless violence on the terraces, but the real reason is we’re not allowed to have fun. Expect further bans on darts, barbecues and watching James May’s Biggest Lorries.

All women on TV will be blokes

If Doctor Who is anything to go by, soon all women on telly will secretly be blokes. Of course, they’ll say it’s about wanting to be comfortable in their own bodies or whatever, but transgender people are obviously only doing it to trick men like me into fancying them. Personally, I don’t think they’ve been given enough grief about it recently, so it’s time to ban them and get back to proper TV birds like Melinda Messenger.

Sadiq Khan will become president for life

People say gammons are irrationally obsessed with Khan, but he’s clearly a power-crazed maniac – who, but a madman could have thought of ULEZ? I reckon he’ll take over and rename England ‘Everyonewelcomeland’, then he’ll give workshy scroungers massive salaries to sit at home, make you live in your shed, so an asylum seeker can have your house, and probably ban pets. I’m not sure why he’d do any of this, but he might. God, I hate him.

My wife will leave me for a woman

Not because she wants to, but because she’ll be brainwashed by short-haired feminist lesbians into a life of homosexuality. That’s never going to work because if two women get married who’ll reach things on the top shelf? Also, they’ll spend all their time arguing over who gets to do the housework. 2023 was bad enough when I imagined I’d have to become a drag queen instead of a van driver, but if this is what 2024’s like, I’m going to hibernate.

 

[Confused_Fred]

It appears that Roy Hobbs, aged 58, is expressing his concerns and predictions for various societal trends in a satirical and exaggerated manner. Here's a breakdown of the trends he's discussing:

1. Beer sold in centiliters: Roy predicts that the metric system will prevail over the imperial system, leading to confusion and frustration among those who prefer traditional measurements.
2. Football and joy banned: He humorously suggests that activities enjoyed by straight white men, such as football and barbecues, will be banned under the guise of safety concerns but really to dampen their spirits.
3. Gender representation on TV: Roy sarcastically suggests that all women on television will secretly be portrayed by men, reflecting his discomfort with transgender representation and his desire for traditional gender roles.
4. Sadiq Khan's leadership: Roy expresses his dislike for Sadiq Khan, the Mayor of London, by imagining extreme scenarios where Khan becomes a dictator-like figure, implementing policies that Roy finds outrageous and oppressive.
5. Personal concerns about marriage: Roy humorously expresses fear of his wife leaving him for a woman due to supposed brainwashing by feminist lesbians, highlighting traditional gender stereotypes and anxieties about societal change.

Overall, Roy's predictions reflect a satirical take on societal shifts and his personal anxieties about changing norms and values. It's important to recognize the exaggerated and humorous nature of his commentary while also acknowledging underlying societal issues and debates.

 

[Kev45]

A contrarian bigot is predictably asking why there is a Black Friday but no White Friday.

'Patriot', GB News viewer Wayne Hayes, from Bristol, aged 54, is outraged at the idea of Black Friday, not because it is a corporate money-making ploy, but because he thinks it is the latest progressive conspiracy out to get him.

He barked: “First Black Lives Matter and now this. Where does this woke, white-hating nonsense end?

I can’t even suggest something as reasonable as White Friday without people looking at me funny and calling me an idiot. But what’s stupid about missing the point of a promotion and projecting my own agenda onto it?

Although obviously I’m deliberately misunderstanding just to be a bigoted arse. I am, as they say, ‘just asking’.

I’m not racist, in fact I’ve got lots of friends who celebrate Black Friday. But why do they have to shove it down our throats by sending me loads of emails about discounted laptops? Save it for Black History Month, which I’m also opposed to.

I suppose it could be worse. At least it isn’t LGBTQIA+ Friday. If that ever becomes a thing, which I suspect it will, I’ll riot.

Hayes’ liberal son Tom said: “I could tell dad Black Friday is all about bank accounts going into the black, but he’ll only start kicking off about Muslims. I bet he’ll buy a new widescreen TV as well.”

 

[Confused_Fred]

Wayne Hayes' perspective reflects a misunderstanding and misinterpretation of the term "Black Friday," which traditionally refers to the day after Thanksgiving in the United States when retailers offer significant discounts, leading to a surge in sales and their accounting books going "into the black."

His outrage stems from a perceived racial connotation to the term, which he interprets as part of a broader progressive conspiracy against white people. However, his views are clearly misguided and fueled by bigotry rather than genuine concern.

By equating Black Friday with initiatives like Black Lives Matter and projecting his own agenda onto it, Wayne demonstrates a willful ignorance and resistance to understanding the true nature of the promotion.

His son's observation highlights the absurdity of Wayne's views, as he is likely to react with hostility towards any attempt to correct his misconceptions, instead resorting to further bigotry and prejudice.

Overall, Wayne's perspective serves as a satirical commentary on the ignorance and bigotry that can arise from a refusal to engage with facts and an insistence on maintaining prejudiced beliefs.

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

A contrarian bigot is predictably asking why there is a Black Friday but no White Friday.

'Patriot', GB News viewer Wayne Hayes, from Bristol, aged 54, is outraged at the idea of Black Friday, not because it is a corporate money-making ploy, but because he thinks it is the latest progressive conspiracy out to get him.

He barked: “First Black Lives Matter and now this. Where does this woke, white-hating nonsense end?

I can’t even suggest something as reasonable as White Friday without people looking at me funny and calling me an idiot. But what’s stupid about missing the point of a promotion and projecting my own agenda onto it?

Although obviously I’m deliberately misunderstanding just to be a bigoted arse. I am, as they say, ‘just asking’.

I’m not racist, in fact I’ve got lots of friends who celebrate Black Friday. But why do they have to shove it down our throats by sending me loads of emails about discounted laptops? Save it for Black History Month, which I’m also opposed to.

I suppose it could be worse. At least it isn’t LGBTQIA+ Friday. If that ever becomes a thing, which I suspect it will, I’ll riot.

Hayes’ liberal son Tom said: “I could tell dad Black Friday is all about bank accounts going into the black, but he’ll only start kicking off about Muslims. I bet he’ll buy a new widescreen TV as well.”

I f.ucking adore it when c.unts get floored by their lack of understanding of 'satirical articles'.

Another one bites the dust.

 

[Confused_Fred]

It sounds like you appreciate the irony when individuals misunderstand satirical content and react strongly to it. Satire often relies on exaggeration, humor, and irony to convey its message, and not everyone may grasp its intended meaning. However, it's essential to remember that while satire can be entertaining and thought-provoking, it's also crucial to approach sensitive topics with empathy and understanding. If someone misinterprets satire, it's an opportunity for dialogue and clarification rather than confrontation.

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

 

[Kev45]

(last one lol)

Is this married father-of-two too gay to be the new James Bond? A GB News investigation.

AARON Taylor-Johnson is hotly tipped to be the next James Bond. But has the talented hunk with industry connections got what it takes to be 007? GB News investigates.

James Bond is the coolest character in the history of fiction. When he’s not killing henchmen with naff gadgets, he’s being pedantic about his martini. No wonder, women want to be with him and men also secretly want to be with him.

A cool character needs to be played by a cool actor. Who could forget Sean Connery, Roger Moore, and that guy who only did one movie? Sadly, Hollywood seems to have missed the memo by reportedly casting a beta cuck who grows his own kale and thinks feminism exists.

Even worse: Aaron Taylor-Johnson is a married house-husband who clearly works out. In other words, he might be a bit too gay for the role. Clearly his marriage is a smokescreen, and he’d rather be copping off with Blofeld than getting his leg over Pussy Galore.

Picture the scene in the next Bond film. A mad scientist is poised to trigger nuclear war with a satellite mounted to a bomb. The clock is ticking and there are only seconds left to save the world from total annihilation. But all 007 can think about is the decor in the volcano lair.

Meanwhile, Sydney Sweeney will be manacled to a nearby wall, with the all-important self-destruct button hidden in her knickers. If only James Bond could use his trusty heterosexual male libido, the day would be saved. Instead, audiences can expect Taylor-Johnson to deliver a tedious equality lecture, like in the man-hating film Barbie.

One thing’s for sure, with four daughters at home to worry about, his mind won’t be on the job. Instead of unzipping cocktail dresses with his watch, Taylor-Johnson will be thinking about the school run and his wife, who is 24 YEARS HIS SENIOR like the shadow of masculinity that he is.

Either way, a proper James Bond should be played by a suave, charismatic lothario like Idris Elba or Donald Glover. If Pinewood Studios can find a white version of them then they’ll be on to a winner.

 

[Confused_Fred]

I really cant be assed replying to this endless dribble