Raining_Roses
UKChat Familiar
- Joined
- May 13, 2023
- Messages
- 295
- Reaction score
- 198
While I’m sure my fellow forum dwellers are just wonderful travel companions, who are always polite and considerate (yeah, right!), some individuals forget the manners that were slapped into them or, as I’ve found, were never taught them in the first place! And some…well, they just don’t have any bloody common sense!
If you’re struggling with the right way to behave on public transport (or, maybe, have a pen!s), this post is for you! There may be one or two points you can relate to…..
1- Face Coverings
Take them off or don’t wear one- Covid is dead. If you are wearing a scary balaclava at 8am in the morning with your hood up, it’s friggin’ obvious that you don’t want CCTV to see you and want to intimidate everyone on the train. But not all of us are intimidated and actually want to push you under a train, because you’ve triggered a trauma and now- it’s you or me, baby!
2- Coughing/sneezing
Do it on you- the crook of your arm- not your fellow traveller. Better still, do it in to a tissue and then keep the tissue until you find a bin. DO NOT sneeze/cough on the person standing/sitting next to you or into your hand and then wipe it on the hand rail. I DO remember faces and the next time I see you, I’m licking your neck after sucking on a chilli. When you get that itchy rash on your neck, remember that wet feeling you got on the train yesterday….
3- Sitting next to someone when there’s lots of double empty seats
Why? Seriously- WTF? Just sit on your fkucking own!
4- A man, scanning the bus/train and walking past all the lone men in double seats and sitting next to the only woman on the bus/in the carriage.
Us women know you’re a pervert and so do the other men. You’re hoping she has to get off before you and has to rub up against you when she does. You get some pathetic little dick cop off at trapping a lone defenceless woman against the side of the moving vehicle and her having to be at your mercy to get away. It’s sick, sad and demonstrates why you shouldn’t be out in society without a tag and chaperone. Don't worry- I WILL call you out to the rest of the train/bus AND move.
5- Shoulder bags/Laptop bags on shoulders
On a crowded bus/train, take them off your shoulder and carry them low. Why? Because your fellow travellers have heads, teeth and faces in general that we want to keep. I know you have the concept that the world revolves around you and our heads will magically disappear as soon as your cargo comes-a-flying, but- you’re wrong. Don’t be surprised, one day, if you find that bag a little lighter when getting off. Anything in my face, I’m claiming as mine*.
6- Taking two spaces for one ass
No, I’m not body-shaming anyone (unless the cap fits!)- I point at those with bags they feel unable to stick on their laps, in the baggage space or under their legs. Plus, those that spread out- shoulders and knees everywhere. If I feel a knee or elbow, be warned- I will see it as the start of a game I dub Jab-a-Bus and I promise you, I WILL win! Stay in your designated space and store your junk appropriately- and I do mean, ALL your junk!
7- Children
If the bus/train is filling up, remove your loin-fruit from its seat and sit it on your lap. Young children ride free on most public transport, so they are literally getting a FREE ride, so if a paying traveller gets on and the child is small enough to sit on your lap, they should. Also, if it was your child, aged around 12, that was trying to act tough in front of his friends, the other day, by making obscene comments to adults on the train- he needs to learn how to handle criticism and his young looks will do him well when he’s older. I was absolutely justified in shouting around the carriage that there was a 7-year-old missing his mummy and did anyone recognise him.
8- Dogs
If you insist on bringing your dog on public transport, please carry on. We need more of them and I won’t moan if they take up a seat, as long as they don’t mind me perched on the edge. Friendly dogs are always welcome. Please bring your dogs for fellow passengers to pet.
*Disclaimer: This does not apply to body parts.
If you’re struggling with the right way to behave on public transport (or, maybe, have a pen!s), this post is for you! There may be one or two points you can relate to…..
1- Face Coverings
Take them off or don’t wear one- Covid is dead. If you are wearing a scary balaclava at 8am in the morning with your hood up, it’s friggin’ obvious that you don’t want CCTV to see you and want to intimidate everyone on the train. But not all of us are intimidated and actually want to push you under a train, because you’ve triggered a trauma and now- it’s you or me, baby!
2- Coughing/sneezing
Do it on you- the crook of your arm- not your fellow traveller. Better still, do it in to a tissue and then keep the tissue until you find a bin. DO NOT sneeze/cough on the person standing/sitting next to you or into your hand and then wipe it on the hand rail. I DO remember faces and the next time I see you, I’m licking your neck after sucking on a chilli. When you get that itchy rash on your neck, remember that wet feeling you got on the train yesterday….
3- Sitting next to someone when there’s lots of double empty seats
Why? Seriously- WTF? Just sit on your fkucking own!
4- A man, scanning the bus/train and walking past all the lone men in double seats and sitting next to the only woman on the bus/in the carriage.
Us women know you’re a pervert and so do the other men. You’re hoping she has to get off before you and has to rub up against you when she does. You get some pathetic little dick cop off at trapping a lone defenceless woman against the side of the moving vehicle and her having to be at your mercy to get away. It’s sick, sad and demonstrates why you shouldn’t be out in society without a tag and chaperone. Don't worry- I WILL call you out to the rest of the train/bus AND move.
5- Shoulder bags/Laptop bags on shoulders
On a crowded bus/train, take them off your shoulder and carry them low. Why? Because your fellow travellers have heads, teeth and faces in general that we want to keep. I know you have the concept that the world revolves around you and our heads will magically disappear as soon as your cargo comes-a-flying, but- you’re wrong. Don’t be surprised, one day, if you find that bag a little lighter when getting off. Anything in my face, I’m claiming as mine*.
6- Taking two spaces for one ass
No, I’m not body-shaming anyone (unless the cap fits!)- I point at those with bags they feel unable to stick on their laps, in the baggage space or under their legs. Plus, those that spread out- shoulders and knees everywhere. If I feel a knee or elbow, be warned- I will see it as the start of a game I dub Jab-a-Bus and I promise you, I WILL win! Stay in your designated space and store your junk appropriately- and I do mean, ALL your junk!
7- Children
If the bus/train is filling up, remove your loin-fruit from its seat and sit it on your lap. Young children ride free on most public transport, so they are literally getting a FREE ride, so if a paying traveller gets on and the child is small enough to sit on your lap, they should. Also, if it was your child, aged around 12, that was trying to act tough in front of his friends, the other day, by making obscene comments to adults on the train- he needs to learn how to handle criticism and his young looks will do him well when he’s older. I was absolutely justified in shouting around the carriage that there was a 7-year-old missing his mummy and did anyone recognise him.
8- Dogs
If you insist on bringing your dog on public transport, please carry on. We need more of them and I won’t moan if they take up a seat, as long as they don’t mind me perched on the edge. Friendly dogs are always welcome. Please bring your dogs for fellow passengers to pet.
*Disclaimer: This does not apply to body parts.
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