Hollie
UKChat Expert
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2018
- Messages
- 80
- Reaction score
- 110
Earlier today a post was made regarding whether or not children aged 13 yr and above should be allowed onto this site. I wanted to address this with this post as it relates to the YAH room which is loved and used by many. Some of the content here has been given to me by other chatters and included in this post. Thank you for that
The YaH room is a very much loved communial room by a large number of chatters and forms an integral and intrinsic part of this site. However, YaH is supposed to be for 40+. Previously that age was pretty much maintained but in recent times there has been an influx of 18 + and this, along with the facility of uploading photos and the cam, has changed the dynamics of the room. Being there is no filter on the age of a chatter, by default that meant they were allowed in.
This situation was and still is extremely hard for all chatters of a mature age as the topics they want to chat about are NOT the same in the main as 18 - 20 yr old's. the language difference and social attitudes between a 18 yr old to a 65 yr old ar very different, and in the main, the respect shown to other people is different between those ages too, there will always be the exception to the rule and yes YaH does have some lovely chatters of a much younger age but in a small minority this has not been the case, and with no real means of stopping it, is a continuing problem.
The concept of having 13yr olds in any chat room leaves the majority of people with a chill down their back. They are children, and while some maybe street wise, fact is they are extremely vulnerable. Every day I see women, and yes men too, who have been caught out with so called "friendships" .. thankfully once realized, most have enough savvie to extricate themselves from situations that they don't see coming. Online security is a constant risk as we know. The onus of responsibility for a child lays with the parent in giving the correct guidance, but fact is, many children do not get this advice, and even those who do, sometimes ignore it... that's what children generically do and more so when with their mates.
We all talk of predators and there are many and the dangers high ....but there is another aspect to this. What about those genuine older people (some in there 70's) who don't perhaps think to check out a profile and age etc, (and some dont) and they end up chatting in all innocence to a young girl? ... will they then get labelled with that filthy P word? Could this also lead to entrapment?
A few days ago it became a reality. (it may have happened before.. I don't know) The YaH had a female chatter aged 14 yrs old in. In the main room , this child didn't actually say anything wrong, and because the rules say 13 yrs and upwards, plus there was no legitimate reason to boot or ban through misbehaviour or bad language etc the child stayed in the room.
How do you think that made us feel? As moderators we are NOT child minders, or baby sitters and though as it happens i do happen to have some training in the area of safety for young people online, we are not here to spend an hour or longer with each child trying to run through all the dangers of coming in to a chat room.
On a personal note, I completely disagree with any child being allowed access into any chat room, how ever fact is the little darlings can simply pop there age as 18 and we would be none the wiser would we? BUT as children as young as 13 ARE being encouraged to go onto sites, those sites need to provide a room especially for them which is closely monitored and supervised. With different filters and safety precautions in place And most important of all, Trained Moderators who know exactly what they are looking for and how to deal l with the various situations that will crop up.
The YaH whilst the cleanest room on this particular site is very good and we work really hard to keep it that way for those and, there are many, who want a clean room, and thoroughly appreciate what we do as mods, ( i get that some don't by the way ) is still absolutely not suitable for 13 yr olds but if they are removed ... where will they go.... the lobby? ... the cafe ?
This post isn't here to cause arguments or disruption, but sensible and constructive comments on your perception on this topic.
Am extremely interested to hear what anyone else thinks on this.
Thank you
The YaH room is a very much loved communial room by a large number of chatters and forms an integral and intrinsic part of this site. However, YaH is supposed to be for 40+. Previously that age was pretty much maintained but in recent times there has been an influx of 18 + and this, along with the facility of uploading photos and the cam, has changed the dynamics of the room. Being there is no filter on the age of a chatter, by default that meant they were allowed in.
This situation was and still is extremely hard for all chatters of a mature age as the topics they want to chat about are NOT the same in the main as 18 - 20 yr old's. the language difference and social attitudes between a 18 yr old to a 65 yr old ar very different, and in the main, the respect shown to other people is different between those ages too, there will always be the exception to the rule and yes YaH does have some lovely chatters of a much younger age but in a small minority this has not been the case, and with no real means of stopping it, is a continuing problem.
The concept of having 13yr olds in any chat room leaves the majority of people with a chill down their back. They are children, and while some maybe street wise, fact is they are extremely vulnerable. Every day I see women, and yes men too, who have been caught out with so called "friendships" .. thankfully once realized, most have enough savvie to extricate themselves from situations that they don't see coming. Online security is a constant risk as we know. The onus of responsibility for a child lays with the parent in giving the correct guidance, but fact is, many children do not get this advice, and even those who do, sometimes ignore it... that's what children generically do and more so when with their mates.
We all talk of predators and there are many and the dangers high ....but there is another aspect to this. What about those genuine older people (some in there 70's) who don't perhaps think to check out a profile and age etc, (and some dont) and they end up chatting in all innocence to a young girl? ... will they then get labelled with that filthy P word? Could this also lead to entrapment?
A few days ago it became a reality. (it may have happened before.. I don't know) The YaH had a female chatter aged 14 yrs old in. In the main room , this child didn't actually say anything wrong, and because the rules say 13 yrs and upwards, plus there was no legitimate reason to boot or ban through misbehaviour or bad language etc the child stayed in the room.
How do you think that made us feel? As moderators we are NOT child minders, or baby sitters and though as it happens i do happen to have some training in the area of safety for young people online, we are not here to spend an hour or longer with each child trying to run through all the dangers of coming in to a chat room.
On a personal note, I completely disagree with any child being allowed access into any chat room, how ever fact is the little darlings can simply pop there age as 18 and we would be none the wiser would we? BUT as children as young as 13 ARE being encouraged to go onto sites, those sites need to provide a room especially for them which is closely monitored and supervised. With different filters and safety precautions in place And most important of all, Trained Moderators who know exactly what they are looking for and how to deal l with the various situations that will crop up.
The YaH whilst the cleanest room on this particular site is very good and we work really hard to keep it that way for those and, there are many, who want a clean room, and thoroughly appreciate what we do as mods, ( i get that some don't by the way ) is still absolutely not suitable for 13 yr olds but if they are removed ... where will they go.... the lobby? ... the cafe ?
This post isn't here to cause arguments or disruption, but sensible and constructive comments on your perception on this topic.
Am extremely interested to hear what anyone else thinks on this.
Thank you
