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Furious culture warrior claims ‘wokeness has gone mad’ after discovering train service called the TransPennine Express



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Local man Ray Cyst, 65, has called for a national boycott of the TransPennine Express railway network for shamelessly pandering to the woke mob.

“It’s ridiculous; why are they constantly making us think about trans people all day every day? What was wrong with the Pennine Express? Oh, I suppose that’s quite close to Penis Express, isn’t it?”

Avid Telegraph and Daily Wail reader, Ray, also frothed at learning of today’s strike by Union workers. Upon hearing the newest route on the Express goes to the town of Saltburn, Cyst concluded that it was part of a wider woke conspiracy.

He went on, “Disgusting film. Watched it eight times this week and still don’t get what all the fuss is about.”

Ray and mates down the pub vowed never to take the TransPennine Express again, despite not knowing where it was and having insisted on driving everywhere for the past 30 years.

TY@NT
 
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