Bored with a mundane routine?

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Bored man desperately searches for conspiracy theory to latch onto​

Kryst Offphur, 61, is a single man trying to make a living in Hellhole-On-Sea and has become bored with his mundane routine. He is currently searching the internet far and wide to find a conspiracy theory he can really sink his teeth into.

“Everyday of my life is the same: wake up, go to my boring office job, come home, watch tv, go to bed. Rinse and repeat. I really need a good conspiracy theory and cause to get behind” explained Offphur.

So far, Offohur has narrowed his options down to Pro Russian v's Ukraine 'war', the Queen is a space alien lizard and covid vaccines cause death. Any of those would be a great choice.

“There is plenty of pseudoscience and websites dedicated to all three of those conspiracies, so I think it’s really a win-win at this point, no matter which one I choose,” said Kryst.

He also spent a good deal of time on conspiracy websites across the internet, visiting various pages of all three groups to try and get a feel for what they stand for. Currently, the pro Russian crowd is pushing hard to get him to join their camp.

“They are offering me all kinds of perks and impressive sounding education. I didn’t even know I could just become a ‘holistic war based economist’ without any training at all.”

At the time of posting this thread Kryst had still not 'officially' made up his mind.

via ~ DailyWorraIdiot

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Oxford University Study concludes pro disease antivaxxers brains are wired differently​

A recent study has shown that there is a significant and measurable difference in the brain structures of those who believe in scientific evidence and medicine and those who are “pro disease antivax”. The study looked at over 200 MRI brain scans; the researchers studied 103 MRI scans of people who self-identified as “pro disease antivax” and 108 MRI’s of the brains of a control group, who did not identify as pro disease antivax.

“The results were very surprising” said Dr. John Snow, Oxford University lead researcher and presumed Pharma Shill. “The pro disease antivax group’s brains showed significant underdevelopment in the portion of the brain responsible for reason, logic and math.”

So what exactly does this mean? “It means that no matter how much evidence, reason, logic, etc. you show to any pro disease antivaxxer, they will never change their position. They believe they “know” they are right, even without any evidence.”

The researchers are hoping to expand the study to include all manner of conspiracy theorists, Pro Russia v's Ukraine, the Queen is a space alien lizard, flat earthers, Brexit truthers, Illuminati, 'They rule', etc.

Although the researches claim they had no funding from pharmaceutical companies or vaccine manufacturers, it is presumed that pro disease antivaxxers will go ahead and claim they did anyway and say 'wake up sheeple'.