Priti Patel sending Navy warships...

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Priti Patel sending Navy warships to Olympics after seeing fast-moving rowing boats full of foreigners​

The Home Secretary is hoping to improve Britain’s success in the Olympic rowing by ordering gunboats to take out competition from overseas.

After Team GB finished fourth in five Olympic rowing events, Priti Patel has decided that it’s time to adopt hard-line tactics.

“Enough is enough,” said the Home Secretary.

“It’s appalling that foreigners in small boats are taking away British opportunities and preventing British success. I will not stand idly by and let this happen.

“There is limited space on the podium. My job is to ensure that this space is occupied by the British.

“I have therefore ordered the Navy to fire at anyone going faster than us. Or slower than us, just to be sure.”

Back home in Blighty, Ms Patel had the vociferous support of a small number of racist maniacs.

“At last, some proper British common sense!” said a Mr Farage of Kent.

“Britannia rules the waves and that includes the Sea Forest Waterway course in Japan. We have a God-given right to win all events involving boats.

“If anyone from a backwards hellhole like Italy or the Netherlands has the gall to row faster than us then they deserve nothing less than to get wiped out by a 30mm Mark 44 Bushmaster II cannon.”

Mr Farage then started screaming at the Olympics coverage on his television.

“There’s another one! There’s another one! Wipe them out! All of them!”

Admiral Simon Williams said, “Don’t worry, the Royal Navy acknowledges that the Home Secretary and her supporters are as mad as a net full of electric eels and this definitely won’t be happening.”

Priti Patel sending Navy warships to Olympics after seeing fast-moving rowing boats full of foreigners

The Home Secretary is hoping to improve Britain’s success in the Olympic rowing by ordering gunboats to take out competition from overseas.

newsthump.com

 

[casiquaire]

The belief that once they get there, they get housed for the rest of their lives in 5 star accommodation as opposed to the reality............after theyve been processed and moved out of the hotels they get dumped in the roughest part of our cities and left to fend for themselves, facing a myriad of organisations on the long term grift, angry neighbours who are facing the same social hardships who are then told are getting it easier than they are. Meanwhile the establishment laughs its arse off while this turmoil happens. We face a stern choice..........either stop them coming in, OR, integrate them properly and start spending the money in this country on giving everyone a better standard of living including those here all ready. Stop exploiting them for cheap labour, stop deliberately sowing the seeds of resentment and start instilling some british values not only into the new arrivals but into the existing people who believe they have a right to be here purely based on being born here. Im sick to death of witnessing some beer swilling buffoon, with a multitude of kids with different women and other destructive vices and who generally devalues the opportunities we have in this country, to project their lack of self accountability onto someone whos looking for a better life.

 

[Moriarty]

Meanwhile.

"Australia Ships all Competitors to island to "Improve Society" experts say"

The Australian Government has today announced that all "Non-Fosters Drinking" participants will be shipped to Christmas Island for "Acclimation" before being allowed to compete.

Local Experts have said "Scientifically, without an influx of Lager these non-Australians will be a liability to our athletes."
Although providing no evidence for the actual benefits of drinking lager he did later add.
"I mean come on, we all have to stagger equally".

The Australian Sports Council was unavailable for comment.