I'm trying to find a proper reasons why it's important for me to get married. He doesn't care about me reaching age of 40 feeling old . He still thinks it doesn't matter for him how old I'm as I'm still gonna look pretty in white dress. We started being friends when I was 27 years old. We have 2 kids together. We bought a house. Then our goal was to get married which never happened. At some point I wanted to go to register office and do it. He didn't want it. He wants to have a proper wedding with a music dance ect. So why it's taking him so long? He wants to propose. I really don't care any more as I've waited for such a long time I only want to be his wife and to feel complete. When I was pregnant I asked him why dont we make plans now. He said it's covid out there. It's gonna be very difficult to organise the wedding. Now he told me he wants to propose but needs to find the right moment. Ok so all those family trip, birthdays, Christmas,new year are not enough to find a perfect moment? I got feeling he is stringing me along . My thoughts are that he doesn't want to get married and all of that its just a lie. If I would know that sooner I'd never start relationship with somebody who doesn't want to get married in the end. I don't even have the same surname as my kids which is awful feeling but he doesn't care in his opinion this is not strong argument to get married. What else I can do/ say?
many years together why he doesn't marry?
- Thread starter Mumsof2
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hell2bwith76
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Make sure that your name is down on the house deeds at least . Get children to double barrel their surnames ( so they contain your name too ).my unmarried kids have done this .
Is it a big hassle to change kids surnames to dbl barrel if they are age3 and 4
I'm on deeds. The house is half and half we are the owners. I was thinking if there going to be any issue if e.g. one of us dies in the future so the other partner will get that part of the house and everything else what belongs to partner who died? Should I write the will? I know that kids automatically gets it all in that case so they are protected.
S
Saphire
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When you were pregnant, you wanted to plan your marriage, so If your children are now 3 and 4, how could he have used Covid as an excuse not to marry you?
SamBally
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hell2bwith76
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if they have been officially Christened (say in Chuch ?) it may be a problem but nothing impossible. I know that we have 6 g.children from 3 children and they all added both parents to their surnames without any problem. They just started to call themselves by their new surname on leaving school i think ?. Make sure their 2 barreled name looks nice though ,as they won`t want to be lumbered with a crappy name
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TwoWhalesInAPool
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Fellas pretending to be women are hilarious, until you ask them about menstruation.
They go quiet, and then, their period of bloody silence usually lasts a month.
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megs233
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Right, I was once told marry the man if he dies your get his pension [ not sure it stands today] . We was together 8 years , I too did't want to get married again [ been there done that twice ] he want a biggish wedding i said no so in end we compromised small wedding my adult children and his parents and his sister and 2 of my friends . no more. It worked out nicely . Has he been married before?. Come straight out and asking why he holding back on getting wed, If no joy then do as other have said double barrel the children's names. Covid is poor excuse to use I see many ppl getting married in the last year ,
Good luck with it.
Good luck with it.
funandflirty
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If it was discussed and agreed, but then he changed his mind, I would suggest reading this book
LadyOnArooftop
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I'm going to start calling you 'Sherlock' because of your skill in forensically analysing dubious posts
And I'm sure they believe that TV commercial for Tena pads with the woman saying she feels pretty wearing them
casiquaire
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Gut instinct, if you think hes filling you full of sh** ie stringing you along giving you a myriad of different reasons and excuses, he probably is, so on the strength of that, youve got a few options, you can either keep going along with it while it suits you and then bail when youre in position to do so, or you can force the issue and give ultimatums however you might not like the outcome. Or you can accept this situation for what it is and things wont ever change (however id also check the dating sites to see if hes on there, touting himself as a singleton lol
hell2bwith76
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Maybe relax a little and se if he does something negative . before you react.
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Saphire
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Ahhh, an easy mistake to make.
TwoWhalesInAPool
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A
AGirlHasNoName
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No marriage? No sex.
No marriage? No dinners, no washing, no ironing.
No marriage? No wifey privileges.
Let this be a lesson never to have kids without being hitched, I learnt the hard way too lol.
No marriage? No dinners, no washing, no ironing.
No marriage? No wifey privileges.
Let this be a lesson never to have kids without being hitched, I learnt the hard way too lol.
BronzeSquirrel
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Firstly, if you wanted to get married, why did you have kids first? Do you have an engagement ring. No doubt it's kept you quiet for a while. What you have to remember is that marriage gives you certain financial rights. People who cohabitate do not need to divide up their assets and finances, as a married couple would, unless assets are owned in their joint names. You might be able to formalise aspects of your status with a partner by drawing up a legal agreement called a cohabitation contract or living together agreement. A living together agreement outlines the rights and obligations of each partner towards each other. If you make a living together agreement, you should also make a legal agreement about how you share your property - this is called a ‘declaration of trust’. If you are living together and you and your partner have separate bank accounts, neither of you can have access to money held in the other partner’s account. If one partner dies, any balance in the account will be the property of your partner's estate and cannot be used until the estate is settled.
Make sure you both have a will. If one partner dies without leaving a will, the surviving partner will not automatically inherit anything unless the couple owned property jointly.
The good new is....if either of you die with debts the other will only be liable if their name is on those debts. If you're married, you will not be responsible for any financial obligations or debts that your partner had before you were married.
Each married partner has a legal duty to support the other. If you're not married, he won't be legally bound to support you, only the children.
Sounds like he's making excuses not to get hitched.
WickedPerdition
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With a screen name of mumsof2, there was already some suggestion of multiple personalities here.