SamBally
Dance with me until the sun rises!
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2021
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Dave Pile, aged 59, has finally come down after being pissed as a newt for the last three days and expressed a hope he didn’t say anything he might regret whilst off his trolley.
The retired Professor of Virology staggered groggily from his bed, knocking over a small pile of traffic cones and vaguely wondering where the policewoman’s cap came from, before going to get himself a pint of water.
Pile went out ‘having it large mad style’ to celebrate winning £25 on the lottery, and things have been a bit foggy ever since.
He reports the last thing he really remembers is being refused access to a flight to Bangkok for being off his trolley and suggested that if you’re too wasted to get into Thailand then you’re probably having a pretty good time.
“Bloody hell, my head,” he is reported to have said.
“Never again. I swear to God, never again. I’m off the Tennent's super strong Lager for good this time.
“Where did that sheep come from?” he wondered. “It’s Friday, you say?
“I didn’t say anything that might get me into trouble, did I? It’s all a bit of a blur. Nothing like that time I made a misogynist joke to my mum on Twitter?”
At the time of writing Pile has just seen the comments he made on Facebook to his family and 1 friend and responded, “Oh, sh/it.”
The retired Professor of Virology staggered groggily from his bed, knocking over a small pile of traffic cones and vaguely wondering where the policewoman’s cap came from, before going to get himself a pint of water.
Pile went out ‘having it large mad style’ to celebrate winning £25 on the lottery, and things have been a bit foggy ever since.
He reports the last thing he really remembers is being refused access to a flight to Bangkok for being off his trolley and suggested that if you’re too wasted to get into Thailand then you’re probably having a pretty good time.
“Bloody hell, my head,” he is reported to have said.
“Never again. I swear to God, never again. I’m off the Tennent's super strong Lager for good this time.
“Where did that sheep come from?” he wondered. “It’s Friday, you say?
“I didn’t say anything that might get me into trouble, did I? It’s all a bit of a blur. Nothing like that time I made a misogynist joke to my mum on Twitter?”
At the time of writing Pile has just seen the comments he made on Facebook to his family and 1 friend and responded, “Oh, sh/it.”