Completely fictional hourly wage

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Completely fictional hourly wage.​

Why Brits won't pick fruit or vegetables​

The Daily Telegraph is today asking why the nation’s workers are unwilling to take jobs picking fruit and vegetables for a wage that is both very good, and also completely fictional.

After a report claimed that workers could earn £30 an hour picking fruit and vegetables, those interested have quickly learned that the word ‘could’ is doing an awful lot of heavy lifting in that sentence.

However, the Telegraph has defended the article, with one sub-editor telling us, “So yes, technically, they actually get paid the national minimum wage, which is just over nine quid and hour. But then they can potentially earn extra money based on how quickly they work and how much produce they pick.

“So if you are blessed with the speed and dexterity of an MCU superhero, then yes, £30 an hour is a very realistic prospect.

“I mean, it’s piece work, so do enough pieces and technically your earnings are limitless. If you happen to have been born with four arms like a reincarnation of Hindu god Vishnu then you could probably earn £60 an hour or more. sh**, I should probably update the headline to say up to £60 an hour, that sounds much better.”

Unemployed 24-year-old Simon Williams told us, “£30-an-hour sounds pretty good to be honest, I’d happily work in the fields for that sort of money – but the problem is I prefer my wages to be in real amounts, not fictional or hypothetical money.

“Taking a job as a fruit picker to potentially earn £30 an hour is like joining Tinder to potentially date a supermodel. Sure, there might be someone out there who succeeds in that ambition, but the rest of us are left at home wanking into a sock.”

Via - Daily GammonLies

 

[WickedPerdition]

*** The contributor decided to withdraw comment in fear of causing further embarrassment to the poster ***​

 

[Kev1n]

Many years ago I picked fruit on a massive fruit farm that no longer exists. You were paid by the weight of fruit you picked meaning you worked like a slave, always in the summer so warm or very hot, your hands and wrists would be killing as well as your back and knees and after an 8 or 9 hour day that seemed to last a week you would be told you had earned a pittance.

I know this is different today because of the minimum wage which everyone except our politicians knows you cannot live on. So why would anyone want to work for nothing at a job that does not seem like it at first glance but takes it out of every part of your body? You never see the owners of these farm picking the fruit because it is very hard work, as to the £30 an hour, can you imagine how much a punnet of strawberries would cost in the shops?

Its just like the fictional sums being quoted for HGV drivers, in order to get anywhere near these figure you have to be a tramper. That means you get in your wagon on a Monday and you do not see home again till Friday or Saturday and you work every single driving hour you are permitted under UK law which means you could be working up to 16 hours on one or two days. parking is a nightmare and costs a fortune, washing and shower facilities in the UK are a joke and the food you eat unless you cook for yourself is at best, rubbish but the worst thing of all is the lack of companionship. A bit different today because of the internet and mobile phones but this does take a lot out of you and mentally and physically, don't believe it, just look at me, , loop the fecking loop.