Boris Johnston: Public floggings

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Tories suggest councils should publicly flog the homeless​

Boris Johnson has sent letters to several English councils recommending that they publicly flog the homeless as a deterrent, it has emerged.​

The letters stated that it was time to get tough on the homeless who’ve led an easy life with no work and no bills for too long. Public floggings were recommended as a way to motivate the homeless out of their lifestyle choice and into the workforce.

When questioned about the letters, Johnson confessed that the idea hadn’t been all his: ‘This proposal was the result of a late night brainstorming with Jacob Rees-Mogg and I think it’s one of our better ones. As you sit by a warm fire, cigar in one hand and a snifter of brandy in the other, your mind becomes more open, more creative. It’s time to get tough on the freeloading homeless and put a stop to their insidious lifestyle once and for all.’

All the Tory party fully support the new brainchild of Johnson and JRM but the public has not necessarily been as receptive to the idea.

One left-win activist said: ‘Do they not have a heart inside their chests? Rather than getting tough on the homeless, perhaps we should be getting tough on the cause of homelessness: the Conservative Party.’

Labour leader Keir Starmer has called the idea ‘abhorrent’ and promised to have local charities knit lovely jumpers for every member of the homeless community.

via - Daily Whales