Accused of “upskirting”

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Tory MPs accused of “upskirting” Ian Blackford​

Three Conservative MPs have been accused of “upskirting” Scottish National Party MP Ian Blackford.​

It’s alleged that a group of three Conservative MPs made repeated attempts to take photographs up the kilt of Ian Blackford, the current Leader of the Scottish National Party in the House of Commons.

“They’d follow me around the chambers and giggle like a gaggle of schoolboys whenever I went up the stairs. One of them even tried to lift my kilt up one time. I’d like to say it’s bizarre behaviour but it’s sadly rather typical,” Mr Blackford told us.

The members of the upskirting trio cannot be named for legal reasons but we were able to talk to one of them.

“To be completely fair, we thought Mr Blackford was just an ugly woman. We didn’t realise he was Scottish. The Scottish are allowed to be transvestites. It’s part of their heritage. We can only apologise to anyone our playful nature might have offended.”

Fortunately for the upskirters, there are currently so many investigations going on in the House of Commons regarding sexual harassment that there isn’t anyone left to probe this particular incident.

via ~ DailyAyesToTheRight

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Men wearing kilts 'placing themselves in jeopardy and inviting upskirting'​

Men who insist on dressing provocatively by wearing kilts are basically inviting people to stick cameras up them, it has been claimed.

Upskirting fan Kay Geebee said: “If they want to parade around in public wearing next to nothing, then it’s an open invitation for a pervert like me to shove my smartphone up there.

“I’ve going to a wedding in Scotland this weekend so it’ll be wall-to-wall kilts. They don’t have to wear them, they could dress modestly, but if they’re choosing kilts, they’re choosing the extra attention.

“Don’t play the ‘it’s my family tartan’ card when we all know you’re just a burly 46-year-old little minx.”

She added: “I suppose I could choose not be a predatory sex pest, but it’s easier for me to blame them instead of examining my own sinister creepiness.

Plus me and my mates have got a bet on who can get the most photos of actual knobs.”

Kilt wearer Kriz Tawfoor: “Is she really going to get some sort of sexual thrill from looking at a very bad quality picture of my pants? She needs to get a fucking life.”

via ~ DailyNaesToTheLeft

 

[WickedPerdition]