20,000 Leagues Under the Sea

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Newspaper journalist riveted by the story of five millionaires in a sunken sub has already forgotten news of five-hundred missing refugees and a sunken boat​

A journalist *cough cough* glued to every single update of the missing Titanic sub and its five millionaire occupants has already forgotten about the missing boat off the Turkish coast, and its 500 missing refugees.

Ray Cyst-Omofohb, a right-wing journalist writing for a total rag newspaper, who will write about every single update and every single social media theory about the missing submersible, said it was a story of adventure and potential human tragedy that was impossible to ignore.

He told us, “They only have a few hours of air left, I don’t know how anyone can think about anything other than what those five men are currently going through. It’s a tragedy unfolding before our very eyes.”

When asked if he could imagine what the five-hundred missing refugees, including women and children, went through as their boat sank beneath them last week, he added, “Oh yeah, I’d forgotten about that.

“I wrote about that a few days ago now, but that story didn’t involve a PlayStation controller and some multi-millionaires, so it’s easier to forget. And of course they weren't white were they?

''Did they ever find any of those 500 missing refugees? They didn’t? Oh, that’s a shame. 15 minutes of fame and all that.

“Anyway, they’re down to 10 hours of oxygen now!”

TY@NT

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

Thanks for doing a horror filled countdown​

The world has thanked the media for keeping them fully up to date with an unpleasant and exploitative countdown.

The countdown is being repeated so frequently you could name the correct number without checking, while you are kept aware of a possible tragedy you are powerless to stop.

Marti Bishop of Leeds said: “Even the BBC keeps reminding me it’s a ‘race against time’. Thanks for that, lads. Sure there’s nothing else you could be doing?

“Why don’t you all put it as a little two-digit real-time block in the corner of your screens? Ah, I see you’re way ahead of me. Wouldn’t want to lose track after all.

“Nothing like subliminal reminders of impending horror as you go about your day, is there? Nothing ghoulish about that, it’s the news, it’s fine. As you keep saying, you’re hoping for the best!

“Oh look at that, it’s clicked over.”

TY@TDM

 

[Moriarty]

They have to report something that isnt the sh** storm surrounding Biden and the corruption charges that seem to have vanished.
Which of course they wont report.

 

[TwoWhalesInAPool]

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